Today I am a sad panda. No particular reason. Just am.
Except...maybe there is. Maybe I realised tonight that once again, I launched myself into something without actually thinking about the logical conclusion of my launch, and now that I am fully immersed, I've realised what a terrible, awful, ridiculous, stupid mistake I made. But it's too late now. There is NO going back without hurting people. Without letting people down. And while I probably overestimate my importance in peoples lives (probably? Definitely) I still am not enough of an asshole to think I can do whatever I like. And what's more, in the words of some anonymous philosopher somewhere, what is seen, cannot be unseen. I cannot bury my head in the sand now. I can't ignore what I know. And that is shit.
I've been blogging here for 10 months, which is longer than I lasted on any other blog.