Sunday, 8 August 2010


I'm totes alive, y'all. I promise. The miscarriage is over and my hormones are starting to settle down. I am sorting through stuff in my head so although I have things to write, I don't really have the gumption to write them. Also, Mr Man is working ridic hours right now so The Beast and I are alone all day and that is SUPER TIRING Y'ALL.

I get southern american when I'm sleepy.

My pain levels are through the roof, and my legs are doing WEIRD THINGS that legs shouldnt be able to do. Tonight after having sex all the joints from my neck down just decided not to do their jobs. I tried to push up with my arms from lying on my stomach and my shoulders gave out, my legs were hanging out of my hips sockets and my knees were doing some sort of ridiculous thing where the kneecaps decided not to join the rest of my legs.

I've been thinking alot recently. I've never really believed I had EDS, or any sort of hypermobile problem. I always thought there'd be some other explanation, that it was too convenient that a friend should happen to be talking to me about her own EDS, should happen to send me a link to a blog to explain things, and that I should happen to find this syndrome so very like what I was experiencing. But the more time goes on, the more pain I'm in, the more my body does things that it just SHOULDN'T, the more I think 'Hey, maybe the universe had a plan, and who the fuck am I to mess with the universe?'

I went to a drop-in nurse last week, just to seek reassurance that all this stuff was abnormal. She took one look at my hip dislocating and relocating and immediately told me it WASN'T normal, that I NEEDED tests and specialist referrals, that something had to be done. The relief I felt was just astronomical. For someone to tell me that it wasn't all in my head helped so much. I sat down with Mr A and said I really needed his support in seeing a doctor about this. I needed him to come and hold my hand, because I was scared. We're making an appointment first thing on Monday.

1 comment:

  1. EDS is one of those things, you know you feel shit, you know you've got the symptoms, but EDS is so shitty, you really don't want that to be the problem.

    BendyGirl told Mum she thought I had EDS almost 2 years before my diagnosis, Mum dismissed it, despite ME telling HER that it was likely, I had all the symptoms.

    And now, ta da!

    It took 12 months after diagnosis to get my head around it and for it to become part of daily life.

    I can tell you that daily exercise/physio, a really good pain management plan and knowing which joints are causing what pain and how to fix it, they go a long way towards quality of life.

    (like insane backaches? tend to be my ribs out. I can get them relocated and be pain free within 5 minutes now, instead of having to wait til bedtime for them to reduce while I slept.

    (((hugs))) for the miscarriage. It's hard and it's shit.